Facebookers Clamor for White History Month

White people.

First things first. We at Lib Porn believe that Black History Month is an academic consolation prize for an entire group of people, tantamount to a bitch slap of smiley racism along the lines of, “Okay you guys have been fucked in America for years, so here’s a month of black history to shut you niggers up.” Except so many aspects of Black History Month reek of the foul aroma of the white power structure’s system. Black History Month is all Rosa Parks and MLK, very little Nat Turner and Huey P. Newton, which limits the centuries-long civil rights movement among blacks to the sort of fight for social change that white people are comfortable with. Ya know, nonviolent protests and calls for unity. But sometimes, to get some shit done in the face of injustice, oppressed people had to curse or get angry, and when black people curse or get angry white America gets all shook up. Basically, what we learn about black history in February is equivalent to a neutered black panther.

Yet even this racist academic token breeds resentment among white people too stupid to understand that yes, institutional racism is alive and well in our country. After preparing myself by popping several Quaaludes chased with a vodka and orange juice, I jumped headlong into Facebook groups who concern themselves with the issue of why there should totally be a White History Month.

"Damn niggras with their niggra hi'stry munth!"

The first group I found, which for some reason bore the visage of Sean Connery as a profile pic, was a lesson in racism, ignorance, and the absolute gayness of many white people. In the description field, the administrator of this group humbly states, “This is not a group supporting racism or anything along those lines. We just believe that if one race gets a month why don’t we have the same rights. We are not a racist group! Join but do not pick fights or try to insult.” Clearly, the admin doesn’t fancy him or herself as racist. The admin certainly hasn’t visited any Klan rallies, nor does he or she seem likely to lynch anyone. Yet this simple group description, which sounds somewhat naïve and innocent initially, reflects the attitude of the severe lack of self awareness among otherwise decent white people.

American blacks are, whether everyday white people like it or not, at a peculiar disadvantage. Yes, we realize that other groups have their own disadvantages, but black Americans have been demonized as persons to be feared. For example, for about a month Glenn Beck had everyone in middle America fearing that Van Jones and his marxist Black Panther buddies were about to explode Bettsy Ross. The Obama presidency has sent more hillbillies running to underground militia groups than any president in history. And let’s not forget the simple everyday fear of black men and the welfare queen stereotype aimed almost exclusively at black women. Also, it isn’t like black families from back in the day (back in the day being a pleasant euphemism for America’s slave-owning days) always had a chance to inform their children of their home countries in Africa; black Americans can’t trace their national heritage to individual countries as often as white people can. That’s why white people are German, Irish, or Norwegian, while blacks are just Africans. (To be fair, we understand that many young white Facebook users aren’t aware that Africa is a continent.) This lack of heritage beyond the breakup of an ancestor’s family at the hands of some toothless Confederate slave peddler separates the cultural identity of blacks from, say, Puerto Ricans or those darn no good Irishmen.

Dirty bastards.

All this, however, matters very little to those who are very stupid. Users who’ve joined the White History Month (who apparently enjoy Sean Connery’s handsome features a little too much) plaster the group’s page with innumerable comments referencing the disgustingly obvious racism forced upon the white community, which we assume really pisses them off. One user, whose comment received the Facebook equivalent to a standing ovation, said in response to a poster who said white history dominates text books, that “Text books teach about history as a WHOLE, not white history specifically.” This is like getting punched in the face then saying, “Well he punched my FACE, not my nose specifically.” The historical texts of the white power structure (and there is a white power structure, and no, poor and working class whites — some of whom are doubtlessly champions of a white history month — aren’t really part of it) center on the doings of powerful caucasians and caucasian nations. African involvement in these histories is relegated to that of a whipping boy of the Euro-powers. There is little to no mentioning of African civilization, that occurred way before any such societies in Europe, we might add, nor the devastation brought upon the dark continent, not to mention South America, by white colonialism. Sure, you’ll hear that the Spaniards did this or the British did that, but how many history teachers flat out tell us, “White Europeans, followed by white Americans, totally fucked up the lives of countless brown and black nations”? This, dear friends, is called revisionist history. Or flat-out-lying history, if you want to be blunt.

To be fair, there was another user who created a group called White History Month? (the question mark is not a typo), which was actually a formed by smart people who believed that the retards calling for a month glorifying white history were, for lack of a better term, totally retarded. This group (who lacks a photo or any mention whatsoever of Sean Connery) was, however, soon overtaken by young white idiocy. The admin’s calls for civility in poster discussion, and the original intentions of the group, were drowned out by countless racist one-liners and dubious evidence of the rampant prejudice against the oppressed white peoples of America.

Oppressed like a motherfucker.

All of this is very asshole-ish and, I’m sorry to say, unsettling. The internet is like a nude beach where people wear bags over their head; you can let it all hang out in the open, but you’re still relatively anonymous. That anonymity allows the wacky people of the internets to spew their disgusting bigoted beliefs. But Facebook isn’t anonymous. The person saying that disgusting shit is right there, in their profile picture, and might even provide a phone number or AIM screen name. So it isn’t like these idiots are just barking up the racist tree for kicks. They’re either too stupid to understand the not-so-subtle aspects of revisionist Eurocentric history…or they really are just bigoted assholes.

Links for white history month groups:

Here and here.

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